Living with Autism: Welcome Home Stevie


My name is Murray Alexander I am the parent of a 20 year old severally Autistic boy Steven. Steven was first diagnosed
at two and a half years of age. And like most parents of
Autistic children know we have had our shares
of ups and downs. But undeniably the last
four months or so… have been the most difficult
of his life and ours. Steven has been away from us
for over a year now. The only reason that
we’re doing this… …is to show other people what
went on in our house. (Murray narrates video) Welcome to our house. Hello Sam you’ve been a bit
traumatised haven’t you buddy. Nearly every room in the house. This is where we tried to
hide at night time. But we would hear the “thump thump”
as he came up into our room. (Janine) He knows that we love him. (Murray) We want him to come home
and be like he was before. (Child’s laughter) We were married in 1985. We had Tasha in 1991. And then Steven arrived in 1994. First two years were wonderful
and he was doing brilliantly well. (Murray) He was always in the
top percentile in weight and height. And meeting all his milestones. (Janine) Very happy little boy… until when he got a virus
about two years old. (Murray) After that week where
he was ill, we noticed things that he would start to walk up and
down the corridor of our house. And he would be studying and
looking at fine grains in the wood. And he seemed to lose
all eye contact with us. (Murray) Tasha smile… Steven… Steven? (Janine) Through Plunket it was
a Special Education person …who came straight in accessing him. (Murray) When the idea
was first put to us… that our son may be Autistic
it was devastating. But at the same time it
provided some answers as to how this rather unusual
behaviour… it had a label. Steven is a loving boy…
…he really is. (Janine) It’s weird to say it but
I think he’s very people orientated. (Steve) Watch camera. (Natasha) The happy times were
everyday living with him and the funny things
that he would do. The little routines that he has
and getting to understand them. (Murray) We love him. We love him to bits. If Steven’s happy then
we are all happy. I have such a problem with
this whole situation. It seems so unfair to me (tears). because he’s such a good person
and he doesn’t deserve that. (Janine) He got very ritualistic
and we had a few problems. (Murray) He has huge
amounts of anxiety. His life had to be in order. And it had to be regimented, which I think helps to
reduce that anxiety. Steven changed and he found
it more and more difficult to alleviate the stressors
that he was feeling. (Janine) He would bang a wall,
which really wasn’t like Steven. He wasn’t aggressive…
…he wasn’t. Then he would start to hit
his own head when he got so frustrated
and it was like him telling us… …’I can’t handle this.’ By this stage the house
was a bit of a shambles. But his own safety… he was really smacking his head really hard. I mean, to hell with the house…
he could break walls. But I was scared he was
going to break his head. Then he started turning it on us. (Murray) I hate to use the word attack but he would come to us and
grab Janine or myself and would pull on our hair
and push very hard. It was horrific. Because we’d always
managed to cope. That last week in which we felt
that Steven and ourselves… had really kind of lost the plot… we just felt that there was nothing
more that we could do. (Janine) It was a night where
I had actually rung… the Mental Health Crisis Team
and said that he was medication… that he had Autism and I was told,
“We can’t help you we don’t do Autism.” And I did not know what to do. We went to Waitakere Hospital and spend 24 hours in that
Emergency Department. Steven was so distraught,
we were in a room… and he was smacking a concrete wall. By the time the 24 hours was up there
was blood all over the concrete wall… …from where he had split his hands. It was horrible. We got hold of the psychologist again and it was her recommendation that
he be committed at that stage. Well we totally resisted that…
… there’s no way that can happen. And we put him in a wheelchair
and we took him home. I think that was the Tuesday night. On the Thursday night, um… …he went absolutely berserk. I came out here and
he was smashing the wall. There was no wall. Murray and I went outside
because he was just rampaging. He was looking for us and he looked
like he was going to do some damage. He had just had enough. He followed us outside and
it was 11 o’clock at night. And he was yelling and smacking
his palms on the pavers outside. Any sort of surface he was smacking. He was so angry and I
had never ever seen… not only Steven… I had never
seen anybody that distraught. In the morning I rang the psychiatrist and I said, “Okay you win
we can’t do this any more.” I had just had my diagnosis
the day before of course… …of breast cancer. My whole family was falling apart. Everything was falling apart
and it was just a big mess. So I didn’t tell Steven…
I packed him a bag. I wrote him a social story to say
that he was going to hospital and he was going to stay
there for a few days. And they were going to
help make his head better. Um… I made him his favorite dinner and he
came out and was eating his dinner. And I gave him a Lorazepam
to calm him a little bit. Then they all arrived… so it was like he was going
on a little adventure. He was quite calm and went
to the bathroom… changed his clothes and
brushed his teeth. Then they went to take him
out through the hallway and then he got quite agitated. So the Police turned him around
and put handcuffs on him. And put him in the Police car
and took him away. Oh… That night we just hugged each other. It seemed so wrong but there
was nothing else we could do. We could not help him. (Murray narrates video) It was a frightening situation. I want to show you a little
collection of his tapes, which he adored and
collected all his life. For some reason it gave him some
sort of ousted to destroy stuff. This is Steven ten months before
he went to hospital, showing his very gentle
and caring side. When Steven went into the Mental
Unit at Waitakere Hospital we quickly realised that he
was in a place where… these were grown adults who were… going through horrific things in
their own lives to be in that Unit. And our 20 year old
boy who has… the mental capacity of a three or
four year old is in with adults. (Janine) We were told that they
couldn’t guarantee Steven’s safety …in an adult mental health facility. And I was distraught. I was going into surgery the
next day for a mastectomy and they’re busy telling me
they can’t care for him… …they can’t look after him while I can’t. So it was pretty rough, yeah. (Murray) We had to get him
out of that place. We needed to do
whatever we could. He was in there under
the Mental Health Act. So we had lost our legal
rights to remove him. That’s when the battle started. I decided that if I did a short video
and briefly showed people… people that matter… that what
we were going through at the time that someone might be
able to help us. (Murray narrates video) He was sectioned under
the Mental Health Act. It breaks our heart to see him there. But after four Police interventions, including one at the Sturgess
Respite House there is nowhere for him to go. That video had an impact and
the right people did see it. And from an absolute desperate
situation that we were in… things started to happen. (Janine) Wendy Duff is a great friend. She was the first mum of an autistic
child that we ever met. She has huge involvement
with Autism New Zealand and is an amazing advocate
for all families. (Wendy) Are boys are close in age
and they’re pretty similar. And as they started to get into trouble
with Steven, I was there for them. I came every second Friday
to pick up Elliot to take him home for the weekend. The worse thing that can happen
is that he’s very inpatient and wants to go now. I’ve also prepared a plan my husband’s at home in case
today goes badly wrong because if he is uptight
he’s likely to hit out. He can be really dangerous and
I can’t handle him by myself. Hi Elliot how are you? Are you good? Have you got a kiss for me? In 2010 we ended up in crises. For about three months we
were beaten and hit. For us it was diabolical. Through that process of us being in
crises I realized how bad it can get. And I realized that the people who sit
in the “ivory towers” have no idea when you say to them, “I’m
trying to support a family… and we’ve got holes in our walls.” They think, ‘Oh someone’s just put
their hand through the wall.’ Over the last year of working in the
community and trying to help families, I’ve realized New Zealand
has gone backwards. We thought we had it hard
when we were first diagnosed. But I’ve realized now that actually
we had it far better back then. Our funding was easier to obtain
than what it is now. It’s really scary because what is
going to happen in the future? I fear that soon there’s going to be
another child killed by a parent… or vice versa because there is
some aggression going on… within some of those families
that I am helping. There is also some parents
sadly the mums mostly… turning to mental health themselves. (Murray) From that point on where
we had to find somewhere… for Steven to go to get him
out of the Unit. And I rang up from
Hamilton to Dargaville… and that’s where the difficulty was
he didn’t have anywhere to go. The one shinning light was Spectrum. (Janine) Right now as
with every Thursday… I always get butterflies… because I only get to see that
little snap shot of Steve now… I only get to see him the once a week. It’s actually really important
that I see him happy. The guys that look after him
know that as well… because I just think about
him all week anyway. (Janine) Hello… come on. Hello good to see you. Okay let’s take our bags in
and do some cooking. Good man. Can you carry those in? That’s Sean… yes drivers licence
there you go… good boy. That’s Hunter. That’s Hunter’s drivers licence. I got a picture of Hunter
for your board okay. It’s really important for Steven to
know who’s coming into the house so we use visuals all the time. New people in the house and
also the carers for the day. Their photo goes up as well.
It just decreases Steven’s anxiety if he knows who is coming
into the house. My name’s Vaosila. I’ve been with Steven since
he has come into the house. Coming from the Clinic
he was a bit edgy. But since then he’s
progressed really well. We get him use to the environment
and that this is his home. You’re a good boy and you
are doing really good. Good boy. Hey it’s all good. It’s all good okay. (Steven) Mmmm…
Arghh… arghh… Which one? (Steven) Savage Garden. Bear necessities? (Janine) He likes a lot
of the Disney songs. He knows every song that Robbie
Williams has ever put out. There are certain other songs from
different places that he’s heard and I don’t like him listening
to those at all. They will either make him
really happy or not. Savage Garden is a bit
of an anxious song for him. So he portrays his moods through
what he’s asking to look at. Can I sit here too? (Janine reads from book) ‘I Wish That I Had Duck Feet
by Doctor Seuss.’ ‘I think it would be very good
to have them when I play.’ ‘My mother would not like them
she would say “Get off my floor.” ‘She would say, “You take your duck
feet and take them out that door.” (Steven) Ehh…urrr… (Janine) It’s all good. (Steven) Mmmm… Mmmm… Do you want to finish the book? (Steven) No. (Steven screams) Ehhh! Yaaa!!! (Screams) Arghhh!!! And gone now!! Why!!! How!!! Do you want to have a rest? Yeah? Are you feeling better now? Those outbursts of behaviour
happen probably once a day. But it is not every day of the week. There are moments where he’s good. And there are moments
where he just blows up. But they are only short and
we try to redirect his focus. You did so good buddy and
I am so proud of you. You did really good okay. Well done. I will see you next Thursday and
what are we going to make? (Steven) Cupcakes. Cupcakes alright done. (Music instrumental) (Vaosila) We take Steven out every day
and he has a weekly program. It’s to places that are
of interest to him. Good man well done. We have walks on the beach. Ambury Farm is a good place
to go and visit the animals. (Murray) He’s getting on really well. He has three full time carers
because it is 24/7 care. They are fantastic guys
and really brilliant. Steven loves them
and they love him too. So obviously the house looks
a lot different than it did. We had a lot of help. He hasn’t been back
here for over a year. When he does come back
for a visit… none of us want that last
scene to happen again. (Janine) He could come in and
he could start smashing walls. We want this to still be
a safe place for him. It’s taken us all time to
accept how Steven was then and actually see now that he is
coming back to his old self. And for him to know that
we’ve forgiven him. (Murray) He’s coming
up the driveway Janine. Right I will go downstairs. Yeah you can go inside darling. (Janine) He was straight in
checking everything out. Checking our fridge out going
straight in to help himself and feeling very comfortable. (Steven) Mmmm… Mmmm… Emmm… (Murray) This is still his home but
he has another home as well. Now as he grows into adulthood
he’s moving onto a new part of his life. (Janine) We’ve given him
wings so that he can fly. And we have got them as well now. (Beep beep) (Janine) We were really lucky that
things have turned out… the way they have for our family. There are still a lot of
families out there hurting in crisis who need help. (Murray) And they could
be your neighbors.

100 Replies to “Living with Autism: Welcome Home Stevie

  1. In Australia, in the 1980's, existed mental health hospital's, where often autistic effected children and adults we're cared for and schooled. It seemed they did need, routine, informing them of what's going on, keeping them on track, giving them responsibility and purpose, often not too much activity causing overload, familiarity with particular people they can connect with. While at times some were violent they were appropriately restrained either being in a room away from others where they were safe, sometimes also needing a soft boxing helmet, till they calmed down or they would be instructed down on the floor and kept till they had calmed. once quiet and listening to a verbal instruction or willing to have eye contact then a familiar routine to fulfill an instruction was actioned. I have known families also that allocated an adjoining home for their child's purpose, along with 24 hour rostered care from government funding and family in cases that could afford this set up. I deeply feel and admire these families who are so endured, committed, loving and patient in this position and life long journey. Our government dismantled the safe hospital's without giving an alternative. For all the wonderful staff who learned, adapted and were able to assist families in the care, the government changes to dismantle these facilities was devastating.

  2. This makes me so sad. Can someone explain to me how a perfectly beautiful 2 year old boy gets a virus & ends up with Autism, He has amazing parents & sister. Sad for all of them & Stephen that clearly he can’t help what’s goin on in his brain 😢😢😢

  3. 🌺🌺 I wish to Formally Apologise for my previous comment.

    🌟 As I have Apologised to another Commenter using this nearly the same comment but it’s best I Copy, Edit & Paste as it’s from my Heart.
    🌟 Im not just apologising because My Business is My YouTube Name or because I am a Medical Professional But because I to have a Autistic Child whom also has Anxiety.
    🌟 I noticed my son’s symptoms just before he turned 4 and he’s now turning 14 this year, it has taken a Brisbane Hospital (no longer live in Qld anymore) close to 10yrs to finally say he has Severe ASD / Aspergers + High Anxiety.
    🐞 So I understand the frustration a Parent & Child has when no one listens to them. I did have my sons Frontal Lobes Tested and they came back Clear, but happy it was something we could rule out.
    🦋 Even tho im in Australia and certain Medications are banned plus 2 people could have the same Medical Conclusion but different Symptoms.
    🦋 It’s like a medication may work for one and not the other.
    🌺 As a Qualified licensed Aromatherapist I treat my son Naturally & his Anxiety has dropped dramatically since iv being Homeschooling him – I understand not everyone can do that.
    🌟 Follow the link Provided & look in the “Signs & Symptoms” + The “ Pathogenesis “ Sections
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frontal_lobe_disorder
    🦋 As a Medical professional this was the best site I could find that will explain what I have come to the conclusion on why I think Steven & Many others May suffer from. Don’t let the word Syndrome get to you as it’s in the process of being Changed.
    🌟If Whomever is getting tested for this comes back as Negative then it’s something to cross off the checklist and I will try my hardest to find you a solution without judgment as A Mother, A Friend, A Ear, A Shoulder & A Medical Professional.

    Again I’m very sorry for my disheartening comments.

  4. That would be terrifying and heartbreaking poor parents..he could of killed them easily tho they did the right thing get him used to living apart from them now so when they die he won't be in shock from losing them completely

  5. How touching , my little boy was diagnosed with severe autism at the age of 3 , he just turned 6 … I'm so glad I stumbled across this , as heartbreaking as it was to watch I felt so many similarities towards this beautiful family .. bless you and thankyou for sharing x

  6. What a lovely kid. Even though he is battling his own demons! He still loves his mum and his family! And even through all his trauma and pain! Finds a way to cope with living away from his family. All while having a smile on his face! He is my new inspiration! God bless him 💛😊💛😊

  7. Absolutely amazing parents. An incredible family. What a beautiful boy bearing an incredible load. You are his angels as well as his parents….I feel humbled by your example of what unconditional love is. May you be blessed always.

  8. You are such wonderful, loving parents! You fought for your son's life. Not everyone understands that. You didn't give up, you didn't hide what was happening. You love your son and didn't quit seeking help. You are very admirable!

  9. Autism usually starts showing around age 2. It’s different in everyone though. Depending on where you are on the spectrum depends on the type of life you will have. I can understand what they’re saying. It’s sad that some people don’t have the right support system. I guess there is still a lot of stigma attached to autism. I struggled growing up with autism. As an adult I do so much better. I live a normal – ish life. I have my routines. I’m married. I’m a student. And I’m going to be a mother. I don’t think I could achieve this if I hadn’t of had my coping mechanisms and my husbands encouragement.

    The only problem I have is that they’re so negative about autism in general. I don’t agree with that. I get that they couldn’t cope but they went around the situation the wrong way. It makes me a little bit angry. They need to start with being positive. Positivity rubs off. My baby brother has a worse form of autism than me. He’s 6 years old and he responds so well to positivity. As the elder sibling I love encouraging him and letting him know when he’s done well. My mum makes sure that she sends me what progress he’s made. He’s doing so well.

    I’m not only proud of myself for how far I’ve come but I’m also so proud of my brother. He’s still got a long way to go but I know I can help guide him. My husband and my brother get on so well. I think that’s helped him because he can see a visual of how to be with both females and males.

    I think that these boys in the clip are quite high up on the spectrum. Unfortunately there is a side to autism where others have it “worse” but the parents need to learn better techniques to learn to cope. It’s not all one sided. It’s about team work and figuring out what works. The negativity from the parents is abit gross. It’s not about forgiving. The son has a condition. These parents need training big time

  10. Glad they got the help they all needed. But no disrespect , I wouldn't have had a pet dog in the household. If I had a child that even through no fault of his own could be violent.

  11. I have a son with autism and I thank God every day that my son isn't an aggressive person. You have a very special boy and you are very strong, amazing parents. God bless your family 🙂

  12. i can completely understand how you feel my daughter is almost eleven and has autism and adhd and like you our home is one giant punching box as are we. In the uk the lack of help and support is just as bad we have spent nights in hospitals with our daughter trying to obtain help but end up feeling helpless as all they seem to do is sedate her to calm her down. its a very sad state of affairs all over the world when it comes to supporting families living with autism i only hope something changes before our daughter becomes to big to handle like your son because it just seems inevitable that she too will be sectioned one day as no one seems to know what to do with kids like ours. 🙁

  13. Did the virus trigger the autism, or was it just a coincidence that they showed up around the same time?

  14. Hello as a part of capstone project I am doing a research for insights in what is the best channel for ABA providers to share information with parents and RBts. This survey will take approximately 3 minutes to complete. There are no personal identifiers in this survey in order to maintain your privacy. Your participation is greatly appreciated! If you know any other parent please feel free to share it. https://fiu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_2geFrvM0xOLa2l7

  15. These stories will become more and more frequent. There are thousands of these kids out their all growing up. Parents have no plans because society has no plans. The next population for feed the prison system. So so very very sad.

  16. I'm a mother of an Autistic 4.5 year old in Los Angeles, and this video really speaks to me and the issues that other people ignore or don't understand. Thank you for making this.

  17. Knowing what I know now, dealing with autism, when they said he got sick at a young age, if he got strep it could be a pans/pandas case with oppositional defiance disorder. And if he was treated with antibiotics, even if it was a virus but the Dr tried antibiotics just in case, it probably killed off his good gut bacteria and if not remedied it can lead to brain inflammation and autism. This really breaks my heart 💔😥

  18. Seems to me but the parents of these ppl, are all above the age of 35 before having them, that has something to do with it, so old fuckers stop having kids with your old eggs dumb fucks

  19. This was really hard for me to watch without getting emotional thinking about my own son with autism .

  20. I've seen a few o this videos and I'm DISGUSTED for in some of this videos that Only GOD can say WHY I TUNE TO THIS CHANNELS I never seen before today, I read my Bible 3 passages, then this channels showed-up. I got curious to see for myself others behavior Towards this Children SINCE I MYSELF MOTHER OF AN AUTISTIC CHILD, I Thought it was to teach more but I was shock of what I saw from most of those parents To See What I saw….BEHAVIORS OF UNIFORMED OR PLAIN IGNORANCE OF PARENTS IN SOME CASES TRYING OTHERS TO FEEL SORRY FOR WHAT THEY GONE THOUGH….IT IS SICKENING I MUST SAY, for in some videos took me about 5 minutes or so to know it was a child frustration of lack of understanding for not been able to comunicate their feelings or pain cause by what we can not hear but they-THIS CHILDREN DO, THAT or This was/is the main cause of the so call outburst, rage, or what ever their parents want to call it or you want to call it…BUT IF YOU SEE, PAY ATTENTION TO CHILDREN'S BEHAVIORS, TRIGGERS, TRYING TO COVER THEIR EAR BEFORE TRYING TO SAY WITHOUT BEEN UNDERSTOOD, YOU TOO MAY BEGIN TO UNDERSTAND THEM-THE CHILDREN THAT IS….

    Has Anyone though the reason of this Children's Outburst, Frustrations, etc. if due to not been able to comunicate aka their Family doesn't understand what they (NON_VERBAL AUTISTIC CHILDREN) are trying to say because they can't communicate like most of us do (With words, They can not, they try but are unable), so their frustration increases to the point of what they show/in this videos as a type of violent outburst, is not violence by the this kids (AUTISTIC-NON-VERBAL UNABLE TO COMUNICATE with their families, etc) IT IS THE FRUSTRATION OF YOU-ADULTS NOT UNDERSTANDING WHAT THEY ARE TRYING TO SAY for This AUTISTIC CHILD CAN NOT USE WORDS AS MANY IF NOT ALMOST EVERYONE IS USED TO DO (Communicate w/out words)…

    SORRY to say it but some one has to, it is the Stupidity of lack of understanding by ADULTS ONLY….. Reality check for all people=Put your self in their place(THIS KIDS PLACE, You perhaps never put your selves in their place, For ONE MINUTE pretend and THINK WHAT WOULD BE LIKE IF YOU lets say YOU are trying to say with out words that there is a sound, or something causing you a lot a PAIN, like perhaps a sound NO ONE CAN HEAR but they(THIS KIDS DO) and their PAIN INCREASES hurting your head causing unbelievable pain increasing more and more by the second, yet NO ONE HEARS THE SOUND, NOR YOU ARE ABLE TO COMUNICATE VERBALLY (As this kids are suffering) but no one can hear your words or understand you at all because again you can not use verbal communication, What do you think you will feel or happen next? YES, your frustration and pain will eventually seem to become violent,but is not, is reaction to the frustration of no-one hearing or understanding what you say since Verbal-words you can not say, nor speak, nor be understand by others around you when this happens, YET THIS MAY OR IS WHAT THIS CHILDREN CONTINUE TO GO THROUGH AND MISUNDERSTOOD BY MANY PEOPLE EVEN THEIR OWN FAMILY…..

    Fortunately there are some people who are able to help and Do understand this children…. I DO NOT FELL SORRY FOR THOSE FAMILIES SAYING THEY LOVE THEIR KIDS BUT SEND THEM AWAY, NOR A FELL SORRY FOR WHAT THEY SEEM TO TRY TO SAY IN VIDEOS LIKE THIS MAKING THE CHILDREN THE BAD ONES SINCE THEY CAN NOT UNDERSTAND THIS KIDS PAIN WHILE TRY TO MAKE EVERYONE ELSE FEEL SORRY FOR THEM SELF AS-THEIR FAMILY AND PARENTS WITH NO KNOWLEDGE OF THEIR OWN AUTISTIC-CHILD'S SUFFERING….MY PAIN GOES ONLY TO THE AUTISTIC CHILDREN…

    GOD WILL HELP THEM FOR THEY THIS CHILDREN DO HAVE A PURPOSE….

    AND NO MOTHER SHOULD EVER SAY TO THIS KIDS "I FORGIVE YOU, OR HOPE YOU KNOW I FORGIVE YOU", for the sole ignorance and guilt relies in you the mother and your conscience will say it to you SO LOUDLY one day, THAT YOU "AS A MOTHER" PRAY YOU CAN FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR YOUR OWN IGNORANCE AND WHAT YOU DID OR DONE TO YOUR CHILD SUFFERING OF THINGS YOU COULDN'T UNDERSTAND, PREY TO GOD AND PRAY THAT YOUR CHILD FORGIVES YOU AS WELL…

    NOT HAS TO FORGIVE A CHILD SUFFERING FROM AUTISM NOR FROM YOUR IGNORANCE, YOU AS A MOTHER NEED AGAIN, PRAY FOR YOUR OWN FORGIVENESS AND FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR WHAT YOU DONE TO INCREASE THE SUFFERING OF YOUR AUTISTIC-CHILDREN AND HOPE YOUR CHILD WILL SOMEDAY UNDERSTAND YOU WERE IGNORANT AND/OR MISINFORM ON AUTISTIC ISSUES EFFECTING OUR KIDS GOING THROUGH THIS ISSUES…

    BEFORE YOU TROW ROCK AT ME, TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT YOUR SELF IN THE MIRROR,

    I FELL NO SORRY NOT FOR ANY OF YOU, FOR I AM TOO A MOTHER OF A CHILD SUFFERING FROM THIS, HE WAS TOO NON-VERBAL FOR A LONG TIME, HE COULD WALK NOR CRAWL LIKE OTHER CHILDREN DID, HE WAS ALMOS 17-months AND WOULD TROW HIM SELF ON THE FLOOR LIKE A LITTLE FISH CRAWLING ON HIS BELLY NOT USING HIS LEGS, UNLIKE OTHER CHILDREN WERE ABLE TO DO WAY BEFORE THAT AGE…

    IT DOES TAKES TIME TO UNDERSTAND AND LEARN NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION, TO LEARN THEIR NEEDS or WHAT TRY ARE TRYING TO SAY WITH OUT WORDS BUT IT IS NOT IMPOSIBLE, I AM SURE I"M NOT THE ONLY MOTHER WHO HAS GONE TROUGH THIS AND FIGURE IT OUT, IF YOU PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THEIR BEHAVIOR, TRIGGERS AND DO YOUR DILIGENT RESEARCH, LITTLE BY LITTLE THINGS DO GET BETTER, THAT IS THE REASON I CAN NOT FELL SORRY FOR ANY OF THE PEOPLE ON THIS VIDEOS EXCEPT FOR THIS CHILDREN, MISS-UNDERSTOOD, AND SUFFERING MORE THAN WE CAN EVER IMAGINE,.

    I PRAY FOR GOD TO HELP THIS BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN SURVIVE THE SUFFERING AND MISUNDERSTANDING THEY ARE GOING TROUGH DAILY, for as hard as it may be for the family IT WILL NEVER CAN COMPARE TO THE PAIN THIS CHILDREN GO THROUGH EVERYDAY OF THEIR LIFE UNTIL HELP COMES THEIR WAY…

    I MUST REPEAT FOR THE ONES THAT PAY NO ATTENTION…..YES, ONE OF MY CHILDREN IS AUTISTIC CHILD, BUT IS OF THE MOST IMPORTANT FOR THE FAMILY TO UNDERSTAND THEIR NEEDS, PAY ATTENTION, "KNOW AND LEARN TO UNDERSTAND AND LEARN HOW IS THEIR COMMUNICATION FOR AS IS NON-VERBAL IS IMPORTANT YOU AS A PARENT "INFORM YOURSELF, READ, RESEARCH, LEARN" FOR YOUR OWN GOOD AND THE GOOD OF YOUR AUTISTIC CHILD AND FAMILY AS WELL"… (Stop terrifying your other children for they learn from you, they hear you speak, you think they are young but they do pay close attention to what you say and express yourself, and If you don't know nor understand your Autistic child, your other children will hear and only know what you say of them, hence, you make them afraid too….ALSO TOTALLY UNFAIR TO THEM AS WELL)

    +++Please do pray for this Autistic Children, and for Forgiveness from GOD to their families, as it is easy to be critical of what you do not know because you have never been in the situation of this children, it's also easy to feel bad for the families showing the children's outburst and/behavior…YET WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT THEY TRY TO DO AS THE LEARN THEIR CHILD WAS AUTISTIC UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE FROM A YOUNG AGE, WE SAW CHILDREN ALREADY GROWN-UP, THEY SHOW US ONLY WHAT THEY WANTED THE PEOPLE TO SEE, AS A MOTHER OF ONE OF THIS CHILDREN I CAN NOT FEEL BAD FOR ANY OF THOSE FAMILIES I'VE SEEN PORTRAYING THEIR KIDS THE WAY THEY DID,…I DO FEEL SORRY ONLY FOR THE CHILDREN SUFFERING AND MY HEART GOES ONLY FOR AND TO THE CHILDREN AS THEY ARE SO MISUNDERSTOOD FOR BEEN UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE/NON-VERBAL …

    +++HOW MANY OF THIS PARENTS, OR ANYONE FOR THIS MATTER HAVE PLACE THEMSELVES IN THIS CHILDREN'S PLACE I WONDER? VERY FEW..PROBABLY, BUT WHAT DO I KNOW OTHER THAN I KNOW NOTHING, EXCEPT FOR WHAT [I MYSELF] HAVE SEEN AND EXPERIENCE, AND [GOD HAS HELP ME UNDERSTAND]….

    ….I DO KNOW AND PRAY HOPING SOME DAY SOON GOD will let us all know the wrong we've all done to any and all living souls INCLUDING OUR OWN KIDS…

    +++GOD BLESS AND ALWAYS AND FOREVER PROTECT THIS AUTISTIC CHILDREN AND ALL CHILDREN OF THIS WORLD FROM EVERYTHING THAT CAUSES THEM PAIN (including us their own parents and may GOD forgive us all for any harm we have cause them)

    -CAN WE FORGIVE OUR SELVES? ONLY TIME AND GOD CAN SAY IN DUE TIME..

    +++I PRAY FOR THE LIGHT OF LOVE OF OR GOD, OUR ONE TRUE CREATOR TO ENLIGHTEN EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD, GIVE US ALL AND THEM THE UNDERSTANDING THEY NEED REGARDLESS IF THEY HAVE ASK OUR CREATOR OR NOT FOR GUIDANCE AND UNDERSTANDING, For if we ask understanding and guidance we do receive, when you feel sorry and try others to feel sorry for you Never asking for UNDERSTANDING, Perhaps, Maybe, is why our children SUFFER…. [NOT YOU, NOT US PARENTS, NOT OUR FAMILIES WILL EVER SUFFER AS MUCH AS OUR CHILDREN DO] WHEN WE DO NOT KNOW HOW TO UNDERSTAND THEM WITH OUT WORDS…..ASKING OUR CREATOR FOR GUIDANCE AND UNDERSTANDING IS THE KEY, THE FIRST STEP, Before the damage is done to our children only because we do not understand their communication-NON VERBAL… INFORM, READ, RESEARCH Before passing judgement for we are humans that know nothing unless we seek and learn…

    THEN AGAIN, WHAT DO I KNOW EXCEPT I KNOW NOTHING…..GOOD LOOK TO ALL MAY GOD HELP US ALL…

    +++GOD PLEASE ALWAYS PROTECT OUR CHILDREN

    +++GOD BLESS OUR KIDS AND HELP US ALL

    +++I SEND MY THOUGHTS OF PURE LIGHT OF LOVE FROM OUR ONE TRUE CREATOR OF ALL SEEN AND UNSEEN TO EVERYONE HUMAN IN THIS WORLD…

    We ALL Share This Planet, Always REMEMBER and AWAKE, Were We Go One, We Go All !!!

  21. And what do they do for him in that place ..give him drugs ..so they could have done this at home …maybe

  22. Autism is mental illness. I go almost half of the video and i haven't heard if the parents gets any special care or education for their son since he was diagnose at 2.5 years old.

  23. I didn't know autism could cause those kind of aggressive and sudden mad behaviours.. For me autism is a neurodevelopmental disorders that affects communication and it shouldn't appear after a virus.

  24. Is it possible that Steven was experiencing some kind of with draw from the meds he was taking. You mentioned an Lazaropam, is it possible that his medications needed to be adjusted ? It did the correct thing placing him with 24 /7 care where there are professionals to share the hours of care

  25. What medz did they have him on when he snapped?…if they put them on benzos, that can cause problems with autistics.

  26. I am in meltdown in watching this. I am crying. I am scared. I hate meltdowns and so hurt me. Could you help me help my buddy. I have severe autism sensory disorder and developmental problems. I am homeless because of autism head banging meltdown. I never had had autism diagnosis all kinds of severe mental illness and every mental illness diagnosis and no one doctor said same diagnosis. Try help him with this very same thing foresics developmental therapist help me. Still head banging almost every day. http://autismeducators.com/Autism-Calm-Body-Cards-AutismEducators
    It's one thing that helps me really easy to follow. I am so struggling with life skills. I can't get help either because not diagnosis before 21. It sucks because what mis diagnosis of mental health issues I can't get group home or any help. I am scared because I was arrested for head banging meltdown and so much trouble. I hate hurting myself and in jail got bad head injuries from head banging meltdown all day every day. It hurts me to see others watch me struggle. The guards were so supportive and helpful yet sad to watch me struggle with life skills and help with life skills. They crying watching me head banging meltdown. I heard me most severe autism person in jail.

  27. Watch my struggles in hotel homeless until group home and autism testing. I hit my head after each video not knowing why but not sensory problems cause maybe communication. http://blog.andysweathersite.com/2019/05/a-personal-note-about-my-autism.html?m=1

  28. That buddy screaming makes me sad because I do this. Sad sad sad to see my buddy struggles like me. Sorry I hurt my head watching this.

  29. why are there so many cases of autism now? Why are govts not making it law for pharmaceuticals to have longer testing by outside scientists with no conflict of interest?

  30. It's a disgrace that these families have to beg and plead for help, to have to show the world how truly awful life is with their child in order to get some help. These are not throwaway kids – they are beautiful people – sons, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles – who were chosen to suffer from some little known and and even less understood illness through no fault of their own or their parents. We can fund wars, support immigrants on the public purse, and provide astronomical salaries and pensions for the very people who are in positions to help these families but instead tell them that it's not so bad and to just get on with raising the child. There should be adequate respite care and adequate safe institutional accommodation when parents can no longer keep an aggressive child in their home, and there should be no shame heaped on the parents for needing this help. We've fallen a very long way down the humanity ladder when we can turn our backs on families who have to function in a constant state of grave fear and exhaustion. Every parent of a "normal" child should get down on their knees tonight and thank God for the whiney, misbehaving kids who bless their lives.

  31. Prevention is the best cure for autism. 
    Autistic kids are not allow in any school.  They are too violent.
    Obviously you have never seen a violent autistic child, who punches himself in the head every minute of every day. Kicks holes in walls. Common symptoms of autism of boys over age 7.
    That is why there are NO autistic kids in any school.
    Vaccinations causese autism. Prevention means we must stop all mandatory vaccinations.
    If you trust MDs, then you can vaccinate.
    I love pro Vaccine people, because they too will soon have an autistic child, & then they will join the 4 million US parents who are 100% opposed to mandatory vaccines. And they vote. I am the only candidate for President 2020 who dares to speak truth about autism. Vaccines are the main cause of autism.  
    Paul Kangas for President. Youtube: paul8kangas.
     
    I would like to meet with you to discuss this.
     
    My doctor is looking for anyone who is willing to defend vaccines in a debate next month. Are you a doctor?
    She is opposed to vaccines, because they have killed 900 babies every year, and injured 900,000 , the vaccine courts have paid out $4. BILLION to parents of 10,000 injured kids.
    50% of the homeless have autism.
    50% of the men in prison have autism.
    So who is your doctor?
    The Truth goes thru 3 stages: first it is ridiculed, then it is violently attacked, finally it is accept as self evident.

  32. He got vaccinations at age 2, then he developed autism.
    UC Davis, Ca., released a MRI study in Oct. 2018, showing that babies with excess fluid on the brain,
    would become autistic 100%,…. caused by vaccinations.
    Please Google the UC Davis MRI study.

    Prevention is the best cure for autism. 
    Autistic kids are not allow in any school.  They are too violent.
    Obviously you have never seen a violent autistic child, who punches himself in the head every minute of every day. Kicks holes in walls. Common symptoms of autism of boys over age 7.
    That is why there are NO autistic kids in any school.
    Vaccinations causese autism. Prevention means we must stop all mandatory vaccinations.
    If you trust MDs, then you can vaccinate.
    I love pro Vaccine people, because they too will soon have an autistic child, & then they will join the 4 million US parents who are 100% opposed to mandatory vaccines. And they vote. I am the only candidate for President 2020 who dares to speak truth about autism. Vaccines are the main cause of autism.  
    Paul Kangas for President. Youtube: paul8kangas.
     
    I would like to meet with you to discuss this.
     
    My doctor is looking for anyone who is willing to defend vaccines in a debate next month. Are you a doctor?
    She is opposed to vaccines, because they have killed 900 babies every year, and injured 900,000 , the vaccine courts have paid out $4. BILLION to parents of 10,000 injured kids.
    50% of the homeless have autism.
    50% of the men in prison have autism.
    So who is your doctor?
    The Truth goes thru 3 stages: first it is ridiculed, then it is violently attacked, finally it is accept as self evident.

  33. Look how old the Mother looks.Those poor people. I have an 18yr old autistic son. He’s nothing like a Steven. I’m truly blessed with my son. He’s gentle and kind. Believe me, I know ho lucky I am,

  34. This is so sad! We have no systems to help with situations like this. It wouldn't make a difference if we had a system because
    we don't even follow laws. Many of these people are even shooting or killing people there families.

  35. I commented before. My autistic son Dylan was diagnosed with bipolar 8 months ago. He had mania for two weeks. I didn’t know what was wrong with him. He wasn’t violent like Steven. He ended up in a place like Steven. Sectioned under mental health like Steven. I live in Australia. He’s okay now. I had to be his advocate to get him out of the mental hospital. It was terrifying. He’s seeing a physiologist now. He has a brain of a four year old as well. He’s on meds doing really well. The mental health system has it so wrong to have handcuffed that boy. But at least he’s in a good place now. There are angels that find kind people and care for these kids.

  36. All the damn preservatives, and additives, and artificial sweeteners, and flavour enhancers, and anti mould agents, and the dozens and dozens of other chemicals added to food and drinks (toxic waste)… all sourced by ignorant lazy assed parents that couldn't give a stuff what their kids are shoveling into their mouths!. Hardly a sick kid when i went to school in the late 1960s to late1970s… can't recall one case of cancer out of thousands of school children, but then again we weren't eating toxic waste. The really crazy thing is the parents that squawk "oh but we love our children", yeah right!, piss off!!!

  37. No mention of what the doctor prescribed for the virus?, which was most likely a result of the "multi vaccinations". People need to get themselves seriously educated… get off social media for christ sake, the ailments of children right across the board is a god damn epidemic!!!

  38. To all the parents of kids (and adult kids) on the spectrum, you are my hero! As a 32 year old with autism, I know it’s not easy with us.

  39. May I ask which virus Steven contracted when he was 2? Was it from vaccines? My once typical son regressed badly into severe autism after 6 vaccines at “wellness” visit. Have you tried anti virals? Such a beautiful family 💓

  40. My autistic grandson is 5’ 9” tall at eleven years old and my daughter is beginning to worry about getting hurt. His autistic cousin, much older, hasn’t lived with his parents in years due to violent outbursts. With boys, it seems like going through puberty can bring out some unwanted behavior. Maybe it’s just that they grow so much and get so strong.

  41. Mental building should not even exist. They are cruel and wrong. They are vary unethical also.

  42. I have autism. I was diagnosed at the age of 4. What I don't like is getting yelled at because, my feelings hurt easily. I break down and cry when I get yelled at and, once that's done I get really violent which shows that I wanted to beat up the person that yelled at me but, I never got physical. It's very hard for me to deal with with these issues. If I see the person at a public place like Walmart or any store, I just turn around and leave which indicates that I was still angry at the person that's called "holding a grudge" which I am pretty GODDAMN good at along with blaming things on others and, ended up hating that person. The fight could end either weeks or months, if the person who I ended up hating would talk one on one with me. Moreover, he/she would apologize to me and, if either one would take another shot of being friends again I would say, "I'll think about it". If the time came my answer could be a yes or no. If it's yes, we'll start over again. If it's no, I'll say 'No need to be sorry, but, I'm sorry that we should part ways and, good luck on your search for new friends. Goodbye'. Just forget about what happened myself and the person and, move on.

    I am 42 years old and, it's tough for me to deal what I had commented.
    I can talk and drive.
    I quote from films or television.

    When I was 13, I nearly backhanded a teacher because, I didn't like the way she spoke to me. I had her for a teacher once and, she even took my privileges away because, I was behind in my school work. Those are the reasons, that I wanted to backhand her and getting tired of her speaking to me that way. If that happened, I would've been expelled.

  43. I have never made a comment before but this documentary is an eye opener. Thank you for sharing your story. I had no idea autism was such a huge challenge. I understand now just a little bit better.

  44. We can’t help you we don’t do autism…??? What the hell kinda mental health system is that!? Autism is a condition! It needs treatment. When these grown people become aggressive because they need more intervention due to their condition, who should they turn to for help other than the CRISIS HOTLINE! Come on now!!!!

  45. Medication was the cause of it…in my area a boy was forced to have alot of meds down his throat for his autism and he became weird and not like how he was without meds. To the point he run in the street without clothes…

  46. I have 2 autistic grandchildren. My daughter, ( their mother) has juvenile diabetes, along with other health issues. My heart breaks for her and them…she never gets a break unless I'm there to visit which is about twice a year bcuz we live far apart, and of course I have to work. It's heartbreaking and a terrible worry. God please help us! Please pray for us. Thank you. ✝🙏🕯💞

  47. There are 9 million autistics in the US. 3 million kids who are victims of vaccines, plus 6 million parents of autistic kids, who must care for their disabled child, who will never grow up, until the parents die.

    No one dies from measles if they take one spoonful of Cod Liver Oil daily.    

    The best part of measles is you get life time immunity once you get measles.  

    So by taking cod liver oil & getting the measles at a measles party, you cure the problem.

    All vaccines cause some damage.  

    The more aluminum you inject into a Childs brain the eventually, will damage the child permanently.  

    Autism cases are at an all time high in the US, China & UK: 1 in 30 kids now have autism.

    The human race will not survive until 2030 unless we each build a 4-plex home with 100 solar panels.  

    This creates millions of housing units, lowers the cost of housing, all the way down to almost free, the same way the cost of cell phones fell from $3,000. each in 1988, to almost free now.  

    Read: "Energy Imparative" by Hermann Scheer, to see how this is already happening in Germany, since 1991.  

    Youtube: paul8kangas. Paul Kangas 2020.   Paul Kangas for President 2020

  48. I can't imagine how heart wrenching it must have been for you both, but what else could you do? You must never ever feel guilty, It wasn't your fault and you did your very best for Steven. Nobody should judge you.

  49. Most children get viruses and become infected when they are young until the immune system grows stronger. There is no scientific evidence that vaccines cause autism. However, life in the urban environment, the great civilization, the way we feed ourselves, are very harmful agents in human development. It is more evident the relationship between autism and facts found in parents, for example, age of the parents, infections in the mother during or before pregnancy … etc

    https://jralonso.es/?s=vacunas
    La mayoría de niños contraen virus y se contagian con enfermedades cuando son pequeños hasta que el sistema inmune se hace más fuerte. No hay ninguna evidencia científica de que las vacunas provoquen autismo. Sin embargo la vida en el entorno urbano, la gran civilización, la forma en que nos alimentamos, son agentes muy nocivos en el desarrollo humano. Es más evidente la relación entre autismo y hechos constatados en los padres, por ejemplo, edad de los padres, infecciones en la madre durante el embarazo o antes de él … etc

    https://jralonso.es/?s=vacunas

  50. I'm wondering, did they say the virus he got at two was the definitive reason he now has autism? And did they say what the virus was? Wonderful people, you have a lot of strength and compassion.

  51. If my experience help, I was very healthy until a doctor prescribed me ciprofloxacin and nitrofurantoin at 37 weeks of pregnancy, my baby born at 38 weeks, had speach delay , he talks now, I took just one pill during my pregnancy because I never like pills, later after 2 weeks I took one week of cipro for UTi because doctor like to prescribed and push you to take pill for their business, for uti that I never have , it was just an irritation, but ciprofloxacin practically give to me all the autistic síntomas, from a healthy person I became a sick person from night to day, my memory went away , I had mental fog, I had sensitive eye to the light, I couldn’t do eye contact, I loss my speach , I had tendinitis, tendons tears, neuropathy pain, ra, inflammation and problems with stomach , problems with liver, kidney , tiroides problems , horrible head ache, etc, and more illness stated to show after few months,I was living in hell with intense pains for 2 years, doctor won’t help , they will just prescribed more medication just to cover the pain …, they don’t take responsibilities of the damages , what recover me , thanks to floxiehope advises I took flaxseed water first to recover my stomach, I took aminoácids complete, milk thistle, caltrate with d3, vitamin c, charcoal, kelp , bone broth, kale smoothies; but my memory , my mental fog , eye problem and neuropathy pain was not recovering as I wanted after 2 years, sundely I saw a video in YouTube in Spanish from GREGORIO J PLACERES HE HAS A PROTOCOL WITH NaCLO2 at 28% (clorito de sodio) for autistic kids, he recover 100% kids from autism and many are getting better, he is a chemistry profecional , I try it and my memory started to came back, my neuropathy pain went away , mental fog too, I recover in less that 3 months, I am 90% recover, I am really thankful with this protocols, Gregorio J Placeres give to me the protocol for free in facebook and answer in english too, good luck recoring your kids
    From Gregorio J. Placeres protocol I just did before to sleep, 2 hours 1/2 Before bed I took a big spoon of cinnamon and honey , during that 2 1/2 I didn’t eat anything them before bed I took 8 drops of NaCLO2(28%clorito de sodio) in 3 oz of water then I took immediately 3 oz of gatore the one that has sugar or 7 up that one that has citric acid and each morning I was awaking better with my memory. But he has a bigger protocol for autism , the products are found in amazon, Walmart or grosería store, good luck

  52. This made me cry. I’m a mom of 5 and three of my boys have autism. I live in nyc. My 14 year old is very aggressive, non verbal still wears pull-ups. He is on 5 different medications for his adhd and aggressive behavior towards himself and others. He’s super strong and when he gets mad it’s not nice. But when he’s sweet he’s sooo sweet lol. I advocate hard for him. My other two are not as severe and have no behavioral issues. I LOVE all people on the spectrum. I LOVE all people who are different. I just have a soft spot for them all. Makes me so emotional. My14 year old has a 1:1 on the bus and in school at all times. I got him out of horrible special ed public school because they was just neglecting my baby. I gotta free lawyer She’s awesome and she helped me get him into a beautiful non public school up in westchester county. The school and people are wonderful. I know that my son is 100% safe there. I always need help always looking for more. I love 💕 my children and just want the best of the best for them all. I wish I could live forever just so I’d know they would be ok always💙💙💙💙💙

  53. I just cried so hard. I know she was grieving so deeply for the child she had while trying to cope the child he became.
    It shows an incredible amount of love to have to let him go. I can’t imagine the heartache.

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